How to Help When Your Child Is Anxious About Going Back to School

By Leah Campbell | Medically Reviewed by Alex Klein, PsyD | July 26, 2021

"School anxiety isn’t at all uncommon, but how can parents help?
 
Most parents can probably remember dealing with some level of school anxiety in their own childhoods. Maybe it was over a test you weren’t prepared to take. Or it could have been a disagreement with friends that left you feeling anxious about facing them in the halls.

Whatever the case may be, you may have had knots in your stomach at the thought of going to school.

Kids today experience the exact same thing, but at a level that is potentially higher than ever before.

After all, kids today have to deal with the impacts of social media seeping into their real-life social interactions. They’re facing ever-increasing academic expectations. They’re up against a rise in bullying.

And in a world that’s slowly reopening, yet still feeling the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic, many may also be experiencing a loss of social skills and anxiety around a return to school after over a year of online learning.

It’s no wonder that the estimated prevalence of anxiety among children ages 6 to 17 has increased over time — from about 5.5% in 2003 to 7.1% in 2016.

Plus, evidence suggests that children and young adults experienced an increase in anxiety symptoms during the COVID-19 pandemic.

According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), 7.1% of kids between the ages of 3 and 17 have been diagnosed with anxiety. For 2% to 5% of kids, that translates into anxiety-based school refusal — one potential result of unaddressed school anxiety.

In other words: School anxiety isn’t at all uncommon. But how can parents of kids with school anxiety help?

What is school anxiety, exactly?

There are quite a few types of anxiety that children may experience, many of which may translate into school anxiety. These include:

• Separation anxiety: a fear of being separated from home or one’s closest attachment figures, both of which are often required when attending school
• Social anxiety: anxiety that accompanies social interactions and settings, to include those that may take place at school
• Generalized anxiety: generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) can impact and encompass many facets of life, including school
• Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD): OCD is characterized by a need for extreme order, rituals, and perfectionism, all of which can be more difficult to maintain in school and may contribute to social anxiety for a student who is afraid of being made fun of as a result of their OCD habits
• Specific phobias: a specific phobia can relate to just about anything, from snakes and heights, to certain foods and school

School anxiety can look different depending on the student’s age group.

For preschoolers, it may have more to do with separation anxiety and a fear of being away from mom, dad, or other caregivers. This may result in tantrums at school drop-off and trouble relaxing throughout the day.

By elementary school, school anxiety could be related to any of the above types of anxiety.

A student this age may not yet have developed age-appropriate social skills and may have anxiety about school as a result, or they may spend excessive time worrying about academic expectations — to the extent of not wanting to go.

Middle schoolers are beginning to develop a social hierarchy that can result in an increase in bullying and various friendship turmoil, all of which can contribute to school anxiety.

And by high school, students may be juggling problems in their home lives and within their friendships and relationships, alongside mounting responsibilities like holding down a job and trying to achieve good grades for college.

At all these ages, school anxiety may result in school avoidance and refusal.
​
Signs of anxiety about school
According to the children’s mental health advocacy group Child Mind Institute, school anxiety can manifest in a lot of ways. Parents and teachers may notice their students are:

• struggling with paying attention
• having a hard time sitting still
• exhibiting a heightened level of clinginess
• becoming ill (or feeling ill) more frequently, which may sometimes be interpreted by others as “faking” feeling ill
• throwing tantrums or displaying other behavioral problems
• avoiding eye contact in class
• freezing or panicking when asked to answer a question in class
• struggling with the school work (anxiety can often accompany learning disorders)
• failing to turn in homework
• keeping to themselves at school rather than socializing with other kids

For kids whose school anxiety has persisted or increased in severity, physical symptoms may appear, such as:

• nausea
• loss of appetite
• trouble sleeping
• headaches

School anxiety can also contribute to signs of depression and isolation in the student who is struggling."

Read More About How to Help When Your Child Has Anxiety About Going Back to School