Confidence and Self-Esteem
Women often initiate therapy to address their lack of confidence or poor self-esteem. A woman's confidence can vary depending on the situation or context, so one can struggle with confidence in specific parts of their life or it can feel more generalized. Nevertheless, having poor confidence can lead to symptoms of depression or anxiety, so it’s important to address this as soon as you recognize it.
When a woman's confidence is shaken, it’s important to face the event that occurred rather than simply trying to “move on”. Confidence and self-esteem are tied to trust, so you have to be able to trust yourself, trust others, and the environment around you. If something breaks that trust, a woman needs to take the time to repair that trust. If you avoid repairing it, it may seem that you have confidence on the surface, but you’ll still feel fragile underneath.
When rebuilding trust, start by acknowledging what happened and identifying the impact that it had on you. If you’ve been judged, dismissed, excluded, scolded, or misunderstood, those experiences can have a lasting impact on your confidence and self-esteem. In order to begin reclaiming your confidence and self-esteem, be honest with how these experiences affected you.
The next step to reclaiming your confidence and self-esteem, is to challenge replaying those mistakes or words that have been said to you. Don’t allow your inner critic to determine your future. It’s important to challenge the belief that your inner critic is speaking the truth. It’s simply a collection of old fears, conditioning, and protective factors. Allow for a new narrative to begin in your life.
In addition to challenging old narratives, it’s important to take risks again and acknowledge when things are going well in your life and celebrate your wins. Small wins can add up and will help you start building up your confidence and self-esteem.
Another important aspect to building your confidence and self-esteem is surrounding yourself with supportive and trusting people. These people can include family, friends, colleagues, mentors, coaches, and therapists. When you can be your authentic self with others and you are received well, it will be easier to build up your confidence and self-esteem.
It’s normal for people to experience dips in their confidence and self-esteem during their lifetime, but it’s not healthy to ignore it. You’re showing yourself self-respect when you address it and build a deeper level of confidence and self-esteem.
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Dr. Sandra Rodriguez-Siuts is a licensed psychologist and is dedicated to supporting women’s mental health. Contact Dr. Sandra Rodriguez-Siuts to get started with either in-person or online therapy today. She is located in Scottsdale, Arizona, but is licensed to practice online therapy in 43 states. Visit her 'Get Started' page for more information to begin addressing your concerns and getting support today!
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