DR. RODRIGUEZ-SIUTS
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
    • Prenatal and Postpartum Therapy
    • Reproductive Mental Health Therapy
    • General Maternal Mental Health
  • Patient Info
    • Patient Forms
    • Rates & Insurance
    • FAQ
    • Useful Therapeutic Apps
    • Patient Portal
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
    • Prenatal and Postpartum Therapy
    • Reproductive Mental Health Therapy
    • General Maternal Mental Health
  • Patient Info
    • Patient Forms
    • Rates & Insurance
    • FAQ
    • Useful Therapeutic Apps
    • Patient Portal
  • Blog
  • Contact
Search

'I Come Up Short Every Day': Couples Under Strain As Families Are Stuck At Home

12/28/2020

0 Comments

 
By Rafael Nam| November 12, 2020
"Like many married and working couples first confronting the pandemic, Bianca Flokstra and Victor Udoewa tried to go on with their lives as normal.

Flokstra continued to work full time while taking care of their kids, ages 4 and 2. She also handled most of the housework, with her husband helping from time to time. It didn't work.

"Those first couple of months were really hard," Flokstra says. "There was ... a lot of fighting. A lot of tears."

The pandemic has upended many aspects of domestic life, and that has brought new attention to one of the most enduring disparities between men and women — the wide difference in handling housework and child care.

It's what Marianne Cooper, a sociologist at the Stanford VMware Women's Leadership Innovation Lab, calls one of society's most "stubborn" divides.

"The traditional gender division of labor is very durable," Cooper says. "Even the most egalitarian-thinking couples, after having children, find themselves in a much more traditional division of labor than they ever would have intended."

Cooper, who has studied the issue extensively, says that divide, which is rooted in history and perpetuated by persistent societal norms, has endured even as women have joined the workforce in larger numbers over the decades, making record gains.

Yet even as more families become dual-income households, women still do 30% more of the housework and 40% more of the child care, Cooper says.

The disparity in work done at home is now having a serious economic impact as entire families are forced home with schools closed and no child care options available.

More than 2.2 million women have left the workforce this year, far more than the 1.4 million men who have left as a result of the pandemic, according to the monthly U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics data.

Proportionally, more women were employed in sectors that were hit hard by the pandemic, including hospitality and retail.

​But Cooper, as well as many economists, says the burden placed on working moms during the pandemic is another key variable forcing many women out of the workforce.

Some couples have adapted.

Flokstra, for example, says she had little choice. She desperately needed sleep after exhausting days at a new job in international aid while also taking care of all of her other responsibilities.

She started sending the kids to her husband, unprompted. Then, she started drafting to-do lists — activities she and her husband would split day to day.

​But getting there wasn't easy. It wasn't that Udoewa wasn't willing to help; he was.

Flokstra says she had become so used to doing household chores that she found it hard to delegate — and trust — her own husband to do the job.
​
That hesitancy is surprisingly common among women, according to Cooper.

​It's a complicated mix of "mother's guilt" as well as societal expectations on couples, where men are still seen as the breadwinners."
Finish Reading about the strain on couples during the pandemic
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Archives

    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    October 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    February 2018
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    May 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    November 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016

    Categories

    All
    4th Trimester
    Anxiety
    Babies
    Baby
    Black Lives Matter
    Black Maternal Mental Health
    Black Motherhood
    Body Image
    Brain Health
    Breakup
    Breastfeeding
    Breast Milk Anitibodies
    Cannabis And Breastfeeding
    Childbirth
    Childhood Anxiety
    Children
    Climate Change
    Cognitive Dissonance
    Collaborative Commuication
    Communication
    Confidence
    Coping
    Coronavirus
    Counseling Scottsdale
    COVID 19
    COVID-19
    COVID 19 Vaccine And Pregnancy
    Depression
    Diversity
    Doom Spiral
    Dr. Rodriguez Siuts
    Dr. Rodriguez-siuts
    Early Relationships
    Easy Dinner Recipes
    Economy
    Emotion
    Empaths
    Empathy
    Essential Oils Safety While Pregnant
    Exercise
    Failure
    Family Moments
    Family Roadtrip
    Fathers
    Fear
    Feeding And Nutrition
    Fertility
    Finland
    Food And Mood
    Frontline Moms
    Gender Inequality
    Goal Setting
    Grief And Loss
    Guided Meditation
    Halloween Kids Crafts
    Happiness
    Happy Couples
    Healing
    Health
    Healthy Foods
    Healthy Gut
    Healthy Pregnancy
    Healthy Relationships
    Improved Mood
    Infant Mental Health
    Infertility
    Inner Peace
    Inspiration
    Kids At Home Art Activities
    Kids Mindfulness Activities
    Listening
    Marriage
    Maternal Mental Health
    Maternal Mental Health Disorders
    Maternal Mental Health Psychologist
    Maternity Costumes
    Meditation
    Meditation For Pregnancy
    Megan Markle
    Men And Postpartum Depression
    Men's Health
    Mental Health
    Mental Health Of Children And Parents
    Mindfullness
    Mindfulness
    Miscarriage
    Mom Guilt
    Mom Shaming
    Motherhood
    Mothers In Crisis
    Motivation
    Newborn
    New Mom
    Nighttime Affirmations
    Nutrition
    Nutrition For The Brain
    Pandemic
    Pandemic Parenting
    Pandemic Pregnancy
    Pandemic Unemployment
    Panic Attacks
    Parental Leave
    Parenting
    Perfectionism
    Performance
    Perimenopause
    Perinatal Anxiety
    Perinatal Depression
    Perinatal Mental Health
    Perinatalmooddisorders
    Personal Stories
    Polycystic Ovary Syndrome
    Positive Affirmations
    Positive Benefits Of Nature
    Positive Habits
    Positive Parenting
    Positive Pregnancy Affirmations
    Positive Self-Affirmations
    Postpartum
    Postpartum Anxiety
    Postpartum Care
    Postpartum Depression
    Postpartum Fitness
    Postpartum Healing
    Postpartum Health
    Postpartum Mental Health
    Postpartum Mood Concerns
    Postpartum OCD
    Postpartum Psychosis
    Postpartum Recovery
    Postpartum Scary Thoughts
    Postpartum Self Care
    Postpartum Self-care
    Postpartum Support
    Postpartum Workouts
    Preemies
    Pregnancy
    Pregnancy Costumes
    Pregnancy Insomnia
    Pregnancy Loss
    Pregnancy Meditation
    Pregnancy Nutrition
    Pregnancy Pillows
    Pregnancy Risks
    Pregnancy Stretches
    Pregnancy Yoga
    Prenatal Care
    Prenatal Depression
    Prenatal Massage
    Prenatal Self Care
    Prenatal Self-care
    Prenatal Workouts
    Prenatal Yoga Bedtime
    Procrastination
    Relationship Advice
    Relationships
    Remedies Pregnancy Gas
    Reproductive Mental Health
    Resiliency
    Sandra Rodriguez Siuts
    Sandra Rodriguez-siuts
    School Anxiety
    Scottsdale Psychologist
    Second Infertility
    Self-care
    Self-care Tips
    Self-esteem
    Setting Boundaries
    Sleep
    Sleep And Pregnancy
    Social Connectedness
    Social Justice
    Stay At Home Orders
    Staying Grounded
    Stillborn
    Stress
    Success
    Suicide
    Surrogacy
    Teaching Kids Manners
    Teen Mental Health
    Therapy
    Therapy Arizona
    Therapy Phoenix
    Therapy Scottsdale
    Time Management Tips
    Traumatic Birth
    Vacation
    Webinar
    Well-behaved Kids
    Wellness
    Women
    Women Losing Jobs
    Women's Health
    Women's Health Psychologist
    Womens Health Psychologist
    Womens Mental Health
    Womens Psychology
    Working Moms
    Workplace
    Youth Sports
    Zulresso

    RSS Feed

Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
​SANDRA RODRIGUEZ-SIUTS, PH.D., LLC 

9590 E Ironwood Square Drive, Suite 210
Scottsdale, AZ 85258
Phone: (480) 473-5411
Fax: (480) 436-6900
© Copyright 2023 Sandra Rodriguez-Siuts, Ph.D. - All Rights Reserved
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
    • Prenatal and Postpartum Therapy
    • Reproductive Mental Health Therapy
    • General Maternal Mental Health
  • Patient Info
    • Patient Forms
    • Rates & Insurance
    • FAQ
    • Useful Therapeutic Apps
    • Patient Portal
  • Blog
  • Contact